The dangers of pop psychology
What is Pop Psychology, why should it concern us, and how does it connect with the concept of “Toxic Positivity”, something that is getting a lot of buzz these days? Let’s look into it, because this is worth knowing.
First, what is Pop Psychology? It is something that everybody thinks is true. It is accepted as fact. It is accepted as “everybody knows that”. It sounds right. It sounds good, even useful. It sounds like common sense. But it is a variant of a core truth. Repeat that – it is a variant of the core truth. And because it is a variation, it is no longer solid.
Examples? The first that comes to mind – and comes up in sessions often – is that “women marry somebody just like their father”. Sounds right? Often true. But the core is actually that we all tend to marry someone like our dominant parent. For women, this may or may not have been their father. It is very possible for a woman to marry a male version of her mother, if mother was the dominant parent.
Another very pervasive common theme accepted to the level it qualifies as pop psychology is the concept that anxiety and depression are imbalances of chemicals in the brain. With the exception of specific illnesses or injuries, there is no medical or scientific evidence to actually support this. It is derived from “if medication helps, then it must be so”. Show me the proof – I have yet to find it! The result is that we feel helpless toward anxiety and depress and are more likely to give into it.
Now comes the newest concept of “Toxic Positivity”. What is this? The core is true. Telling someone to cheer up when they are down can be toxic if they are not allowed to experience and express how they truly feel about something. Negating how a person feels can become toxic. Devaluating a person’s emotions can become toxic. Telling a person they have no right to feel a given way is toxic.
However, this has quickly gravitated to don’t try to “look on the bright side”, which is undermining tried and true quality therapy that works to help a person develop better functioning by spending the time and effort to develop neuropathways to process life in ways that see and embrace the good, the comfortable, the enjoyable, the beneficial. Yes, with work and effort, ee can train our brains to experience more of these things. Unfortunately, I fear that this is quickly sliding into the pop psychology concept of “toxic positivity”.
There is almost always something to be grateful for. Years ago, Oprah brought the public’s attention to writing a “gratefulness journal”. This is an excellent exercise for the brain. Variations of this exercise has been part of the toolbox of therapists for decades. It helps combat fixation on problems, worry, and negativity. When we focus on the depressive side, we miss the good, the desirable, the pleasant and enjoyable entirely.
Quality therapy can help us redirect the way our brains process to see the good around us. This is definitely not the same thing as saying that the problem does not exist. It does not in any way demean what a person is truly feels.
It helps develop capacity to feel better more of the time. That does not come naturally to many of us. It requires perseverance and effort.
This is NOT “Toxic Positivity”.
