Walking Away is Popular, but is there more?

This week a colleague posted about walking away from negativity and people who do not support us.  This sounds good.  No, it sounds reasonable.  And there is no doubt that it is some times absolutely the right thing to do.

But there is more to this mindset.  Let’s ask ourselves:

If we are always walking away from everything that is uncomfortable (maybe extremely uncomfortable), are we developing to our highest potential?

Not everyone can walk away from a family member who is toxic.  Not everyone is willing to walk away from a family member like this.  Many have to work for a living and cannot walk away from a toxic work environment, at least not immediately.  Children cannot escape parents who are toxic.

These can be opportunities – yes, opportunities – to develop strength, resilience, and new tools to navigate life in a positive way.  Learning to navigate and perhaps even through around a variety of personalities creates leaders.  Learning to set boundaries, communicate them appropriately, and maintain them is a key to healthy living.

After all – to quote another meme – the ship doesn’t sink because of the water around it, it sinks because the water gets in it and takes it down.  Isn’t this a good depiction of how toxicity affects us?

These situations can help us develop strength, adaptability, and resilience.  It does not come easy and please, do not think that I am suggesting that everyone stay and tolerate abuse!  No!  But situations can afford us the opportunity to grow as a person in ways that ease cannot.

If we’re always walking away from everything that is uncomfortable, when will we stop walking away?  Won’t it cause is to be always leaving?

A key ingredient missing today is resilience.  The ability to bend, adapt, flourish in spite of, and recover.  I see it everywhere in our news today – demanding that everyone else change to adapt to my expectations.  Then expectations become demands.  This goes all the way down to elementary school children.  Without resilience, we become offended, shut off and lash out.  We are seeing far too much lashing out these days, aren’t we?

Let’s give some serious thought to developing resilience.  It is the opposite of becoming a doormat – it is strength to become who you are meant to become in spite of what is going on around you.  Let’s plug that hole and bail the water out of our boats and continue on our journey rather than always dodging to get away.

Perhaps there is a new way to see things, to approach them, to navigate and thrive?

Most of the time, we need someone to walk by our side to support us in this endeavor.   That is where a therapist can be very beneficial.  Schedule your free 15 minute phone consultation to talk about your struggles, your journey, your hopes and dreams.